I can never get the greeting right. Is it once on each cheek or is it three times? And should I plant the actual smooch on the cheek or is it the disingenuous air kiss? Luckily, it’s always friends and family, so I’m okay with getting it wrong, business deals and lives are not in the balance.
Mark McCrum’s Going Dutch in Beijing: How to Behave Properly When Far Away from Home
There’s no way McCrum could have addressed every possible situation – you’d have to have an international dictionary of etiquette – but he does a good job of addressing some of the top level scenarios. There are some anecdotes and more detailed explanations mixed in to each section. The book tries to follow a narrative format, starting with hello, ending with goodbye, with conversation, business, holidays, dating, and lots of other useful divisions in between. I found the format a bit forced, but even so, I read the book cover to cover over a weekend.
I wouldn’t take this book on my round the world trip, but it’s a good pre-trip read, if only to sensitize a traveler to the potential land mines of your behavior while you’re abroad, be it for business or pleasure. I thought the sections on business were especially enlightening – for the life of me, I can’t imagine a scenario in which it would be acceptable to nod off during a meeting but, hey, whaddaya know?
For a short while I worked at Sony in Salzburg, Austria. Austrians greet each other with “Mahlzeit!” at meal times. Roughly translated it means “Bon Appetit!” When walking from our building to the cafeteria, you’d hear “Mahlzeit!” dozens of times, with the appropriate response being “Mahlzeit!” right back. One of the project managers told me that they’d recently had a group of visitors from Sony, Japan. After the third day, one of the Japanese guests got up the nerve to ask about the greeting. “Why do you all greet each other with “Mozart” at lunch time? Is it because you’re in Salzburg?”
Want a copy of Going Dutch in Beijing? Post your favorite story about a cultural misunderstanding and leave a link in the comments. I’ll pick three winners at random. You’ve got until May 1st May 7th. Holding this for another week while hoping for a few more stories.
Thanks, all. Comments are now closed.
Oh Pam! I laughed and laughed here. I used to live in south-west Germany where they also say “Mahlzeit”, only not just near mealtimes, but any time you pass anyone in a corridor in an office building. If only I’d thought they were saying Mozart … how gorgeous! I’ll have to come up with my favorite cultural misunderstanding story and post it soon. So many to choose from!
Hilarious! I lived in France for a year and know only too well how cultural differences can make for embarrassing and funny stories. My personal favorite happened when my mother came to visit me. She went to the store on her own, and was trying to find the checkout line. Intending to say “la queue” (the line), she mistakenly asked for “le cul” (the ass) instead. Was the poor employee ever confused! She didn’t realize why he looked so shocked until she got back home and told me what had happened.
I have had so many strange and funny situations in other cultures that I found it hard to think of just one, simple story – but I finally settled on one time when I ate grapes in Japan 🙂
Grapes seem like such an innocuous thing to get wrong, too!
I wish I had more tales of cultural misunderstandings. You’d think, having traveled to France and China, as well as England and Scotland, that I’d have experienced these moments. But, other than trying to decipher the British pub menu (spotted dick, anyone?), not so much. I did write about for The Traveler (http://www.touristtravel.com/article0405_bangers_and_mash.htm.Maybe) that can count.
For whatever reason, I have certainly had my share of cultural misunderstandings yet can’t seem to think of any really *funny* examples.
The first time I came to Europe at 15, I lived for three weeks with a host family. It was the first time I had come into contact with a shelf toilet (this site, and many others if you google “shelf toilet,” humorously describes the many complications for those unfamiliar with the style). Also, Germans are incredibly, um, anal when it comes to toilet cleanliness. Much embarrassment over toilet etiquette ensued.
Another point of confusion was European vs. American bedding. Europeans have a fitted sheet over the mattress and a covered comforter. Americans have a fitted sheet over the mattress, a flat sheet between you and the blankets, with the comforter (usually uncovered) on top. I wasn’t clear how I was supposed to sleep with the blanket but no flat sheet. Was I supposed to climb into the pocket with the comforter, like a sleep sack? Was I supposed to wrap myself in it like a taco, as that’s how it was folded? Only then did I understand how my host sister (who had stayed with us in the U.S. the previous fall) had never figured out to pull back the flat sheet from the fully-made bed. We had scratched our heads stripping the bed after she left, but she probably thought it was gross that we sleep in direct contact with the blankets!
Recently on my trip to the UK, I was enjoying the subtle yet interesting differences in British and American English. One of my favorites, spotted in a ladies restroom: “adhesive towels” for sale. Doesn’t that sound like a painful way to dry off?