Osama wasn’t in my backpack full of photography gear in the Dallas-Fort Worth domestic terminal. The TSA agent was unflinchingly polite, but all the same, I was irritated when she pawed through my bag. I’d just arrived from Santiago, Chile. I’d been in the airport for an hour or so, that time spent in customs and immigration, one floor down. Prior to that I’d spent about ten hours in the air. Osama was also not in my water bottle, tossed on to a heap of water bottles at the Newark airport. Nor was he in my pants when I arrived at Sea-Tac for a full body scan. “You need to look straight ahead, Ma’am,” said the huge security guard. “Don’t look at me.” “Why?” I asked. “Straight ahead,” he replied. At that moment, I was hot with anger.
My past crimes include casual drug use and speeding. I have received parking tickets. I may have helped myself to some office supplies. I am not, nor I have I ever been a terrorist or murderer. I’m a tree hugging liberal who’s against the death penalty. I have never held a gun. Yet, every time I go to the airport, I am treated like a criminal. I have been treated like a criminal since shortly after 9-11. The evidence against me? I hold a plane ticket.
Along with thousands, maybe millions of people, I watched President Obama’s speech about how Osama bin Laden had been located and killed in a precision strike on his compound in Islamabad, Pakistan. The President was serious and direct and looked, dare I say it, heroic. I noticed the gray around the edges of his hair, his spectacular suit. I heard his statement that “the US is not — has never been — at war with Islam.” But honestly, I absorbed little else of what he said. I was trying to figure out how I felt about this monumental news.
Before and after the speech, the station I was watching cut back and forth between a video feed at the White House gates. The cameras showed mostly white kids in their early 20s waving flags and cheering, mugging thumbs ups for the camera. They sang patriotic songs and woo-hooed, one guy had his buddy on his shoulders, the guy up top pumped his fists in the air. Sorority girls in shorts beamed, wide faced and blonde, at camera men. These kids were what, ten years old on 9-11? The entire time of their adult lives, air travel has been grounds for suspicion. I did not share their party-like joy.
I walked away from the television. I sat in the dark and started to cry. I thought of my friends who were in Manhattan on 9-11, of my friend who I visited in New York last year. I was waiting for her at the wrong intersection. When we finally connected, she pointed up the broad avenue. “The towers used to be there. It was easier to find your way then, I’d have just told you to head for the towers.” I thought about what I did on 9-11 — talked on the phone, watched a lot of television, wandered around my house in a bizarre state of disbelief.
Osama bin Laden’s killing brings justice to the families and friends of the 9-11 victims. To say I’m pleased for them would be wrong, rather, I hope that they feel some kind of satisfaction. My best friend suggested they might feel like those who see war criminals brought to trial and called to account for their actions. I wondered if they might also feel like people that see murderers sentenced for their horrific crimes.
Immediately following the President’s remarks, the State Department issued a warning to travelers. “Americans abroad” were warned to stay in their hotels and homes, to avoid large gatherings because of fear of reprisals, of anti-American violence in response to Osama bin Laden’s death. The witch is dead, but there is no celebration, instead, we are all still locked in the castle. Flying monkeys are everywhere.
The facts are a bit hard to pin down. Depending on your source, it appears that around 6000 soldiers have died in the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. About 3000 people died on 9-11. Numbers on the other side are harder to find, we don’t know exactly how many people — soldiers and civilians — have died on the enemy side of our wars. We can agree that 9-11 was the start of a series of events that will not end with this one act of justice.
Osama’s death does not bring back the dead. It does not end Al-Qaeda. It does not stop our fear, the State Department has seen to that. It does not mean I can wrap my arms around my husband the moment before I board the plane. It does not mean we are all exonerated for the crime of holding a plane ticket. It does not return looted objects to the museums of Baghdad. It does not bring our soldiers home to their families. It does not end the “Global War on Terror.” It does not secure our safety. It does not restore our civil rights.
I felt — I still feel — very, very sad. We have one act of justice, but we have no peace.
Related: Fallen Towers, Broken Hearts
Pam, thank you for being a voice of rational thought during this time. Best thing I’ve read all morning.
Justice, yes. But I find it hard to celebrate the death of another. It was apalling to watch the people celebrating outside the White House last night. More appropriate would have been to stand quietly. I share your sadness for what we have lost.
Powerful.
All I can say.
Thanks for this, Pam.
Well said, Pam. Thanks.
Beautiful piece, Pam. I turned off the television, got the heck off of social media and just sat in my own thoughts. I found I was incredibly confused and angry by the things other people were saying about the news, and I still need to decide how I feel about the situation.
Very well said. I feel disconnected from the celebrations (though I don’t deny those people their grief, I was just at ground zero in March), and I still think there are too many questions remaining (buried at sea? really?) to chalk this up as some sort of victory…of what?
I, too, hope we can go back to pre-pat-down days and troops closer to home, but I think that will never happen.
I’ve had a dull, sick feeling today, watching the celebrations that shouldn’t be celebrations for all sorts of reasons.
It’s one thing to feel a sense of justice. I get that. I get the need for it, even if I probably don’t understand the full emotional Why that other people are embracing.
But it’s another thing for people to wallow, waving their hats and shouting on camera, and for certain news networks to turn it into a Victory In The Middle East day. That makes it something other than what it is. I don’t exactly know what it is, and maybe I don’t have the right to say as I’m way over here in the UK and have been for the last decade.
But turning it into a party turns my stomach.
However, I do know that I am deeply happy it’s Obama and not Bush who is in the White House right now.
Pam, this is both a brilliant and moving post. Bravo. I am saddened . . . . deeply saddened today . . . . because today I have been reflecting on how much we have lost by the acts led by one man 10 years ago. Freedom and security cannot be regained by Osama’s death. You are so right: one act of justice has not brought peace, but I hope that some day, we will have that peace again.
I agree there is no cause for rejoicing at any of this; however, neither do I see the author’s seeming take that post 9/11 airplane travel is the most personally troublesome part of all this, any easier to swallow. Perhaps I had a different reaction to this story than others. But I cannot get behind her complaints about air travel any more than I can those who lost someone on 9/11 and ARE rejoicing.
I think you’re missing my point if you see this purely as a complaint about air travel.
Airline travel is the part that affects me, personally, on a regular basis. But I see the hassles as symptoms of eroding civil rights, and that’s a very large issue indeed, not one that’s just “personally troublesome.”
http://eater.com/archives/2011/05/02/restaurants-celebate-bin-ladens-death-with-drink-specials.php
Things like that. I just…I can’t….it’s just wrong.
Yeah, that ain’t right.
Wow. You just put so eloquently into words everything I was thinking but could not express. Very well said. Thanks.
Yes, yes, yes. I completely agree. I was watching the television coverage of all the young people celebrating and I thought- what are you cheering for? Osama bin Laden was a bad man but he was only one man. There is still so much hate in this world. I’ll be out on the streets like a maniac when there is PEACE. I will hold my celebrations until then.
So eloquent! Thanks for putting it into words.
flying monkey everywhere and we are still asking the man behind the curtain for a courage, wisdom, a heart and safe passage home, back to Kansas.
But it looks like we have to make due with what little bearing and heart we have left after nearly a decade. I have spent my adult life locked in wizards castle.
Very powerfully written, Pam. I think partying brought about by someone’s death — anyone’s death — is awful. I actually believe in the death penalty, but I never view it as a cause for celebration or even as a means of justice, only as a sad act that is sometimes necessary for criminals whose capacity for evil shows them to be beyond redemption.
This is beautiful. I have been trying so hard to avoid the warmongering, the cheering for the death of someone, and the utter ignorance that omes with thinking that by cutting off the head of a many-headed hydra, you have done anything to stop it.
Our culture changed irreperably on that day. The fear, mistrust, and handing over of civil rights will take years upon years to undo. The deaths of some 9,000 people may have been “avenged” (though this also feels like a convenient truth we tell ourselves), but until we can shuffle through security with our shoes still on, I will not buy this version of “ding dong, the witch is dead.”
Thanks Pam. So glad to read this. Spot on, as always.
Bravo.
I was watching those young people cheering outside the White House on TV, and it occurred to me that they were probably already out at bars and drinking before the press conference…not to excuse the embarrassing displays completely, but that’s how I made sense of it.
I’ll join the gang of thank-you-sayers Pam. You very clearly and eloquently put to words much of what’s been on my mind. Cultural cues tell me I’m supposed to feel good about this. Instead I feel sadly resigned. Will the violent end to a violent life end the overall violence? Can the young soldiers come home now and do the kinds of life exploring that young people do in a war-less world? Can travelers go back to flying without fear? Not yet I suppose…
Great read and good thoughts Pam 🙂
Killing another never seems to end anything but rather continue the process of more killing to come. Something needed to be done but now people fear traveling and other terrorist acts.
Thank you for these well-expressed comments. While we were sampling good local wines and discussing green tourism, the media was having a field day with simplistic slogans and easy hatreds. It’s appalling, but if we keep trying for a better world, one day we’ll have peace and those shoe-shedding lines will be history.
Beautifully written Pam. Just beautiful.
I’m very glad that the men that took Osama Bin Laden’s life also took his body and gave him a respectful funeral in the Muslim tradition. I can’t say i think allowing an image of his blood soaked and damaged body will be a good move. May the world rest in peace.