My Roommate, Claude Monet, 6am, Saturday
Me: What the hell are you doing, Claude? It’s 6am! Claude: Ze light on ze hedges! She is, how you zay? Ztunning! Ah am eeeenspired! Me: Claude, jeezus. Go back to Giverney, wouljda? (Walking away muttering.) Claude: (Enthusing in French about the light, then turning to me) You are a philistine. All you Americaines are …